Marriages, Thunder &Lightning, Are Made in Heaven

Sneha and Vikrant were dating for some years. They spent most of their day together and parted ways at night to go back to respective homes.  One fine day, they decided not to part and moved together. Their romance grew tones; they had their best moments and were on cloud nine. After some time, they had many differences and decided to part forever.  The society had many views:

1. Oh my god! They were living in without marriage!

2. Vikrant must have changed as he got what he wanted.

3. Sneha must have started nagging him like a wife.

4. Had they been married, they would have relatives to solve their problems.

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Sneha and Vikrant were dating for some years. They spent most of their day together and parted ways at night to go back to respective homes.  One fine day, they decided not to part and convinced their families to get them married. It was dream come true. They no longer needed lies to go on a date. They felt blessed. After some time, they could not adjust to each other families. Differences grew and they parted forever. Society had many views;

1. Kids these days have become so impatient.

2. They married on their own will, the results are here.

3. Vikrant must have started taking her for granted.

4. Sneha could not have adjusted with the in-laws.

5. They didn't have child that could have been the problem.

We just read both scenarios - live-in and marriage. It's very clear society and it's people would have something to say in either case.  I believe, it's totally an individual's choice to choose between the two. Success of a relationship is never a guarantee in any choice.

The small teasing habit of a guy may look sweet to a girl while on date. The same habit may become annoying when repeated whole day and night while living in.

Getting the table and surrounding clean may look impressive while dining in restaurant or enjoying holiday. The same may break a relationship when forced to follow day and night.

The guy and the girl would definitely be in their best behavior when they meet for few hours before marriage. The same behavior may not stay same in the comfort of home.

Let's compare the two:

	Live in	Marriage
Freedom	Full	Depends	Freedom is the very first advantage talked about live in relationships. As they are not married, generally, couples tend to give more space to each other. But, it does not mean that people are caged in marriage. The amount of space and freedom in marriages depends upon individuals and family structure.
Responsibility	Optional	Mandatory	Getting married by default implies that the two people are ready to take responsibility of each other. While in a live in, people have an option to choose between the responsibilities.
Social Acceptance	Low	Full	It's needless to mention that marriages are completely accepted by society, while the live in couples have to face a twisted eye (at least in Asian countries). To be honest, leaving behind some celebrities and handful of couples, most of them live together stating various lies to neighbors
Legal Acceptance	Partial	Full	Marriage comes with all legal implications and people have complete right to fight fur themselves if required. The Indian courts have accepted a few rights for live in partners, but they are very few and difficult to win.
Commitment Obligations	Optional	Mandatory	Live in relations are mostly done in order to give each other a chance to understand each other better. People are committed, but fell themselves free to define must definition. Marriages on the other hand demand the two people to be completely committed to each other.
Financial obligations	Optional	Mandatory	Once married, the other half is legally called dependent. Each person has the onus to support the other financially. Live in , the scenario is fast changing as couples these days have joint bank accounts and many more.
Risk Factor	Low	High	In case of arranged marriages, the risk factor towards everything is very high as the person is completely unknown. It subsides a bit in case of love marriages. Live in relations come with a low risk factor as they give more time to understand each other better.
Ease of Breaking Up	Simple	Complicated	There is a reason why people get goose bumps of the word Marriage. It's not easy to get out of it once in. In-fact, sometimes, it takes years into the legal proceedings. Live in, there are no boundaries. If things don't get work out, one can just walk away.
Family Support	Low	High	Our families would anytime be in favor of marriages. Live in may look cool to youngsters, but families still have hesitation accepting them.
Expansion of family	Difficult	Easy	Everyone dreams of having a kid and  it's well known and expected on married. Live in couples on the other hand face difficulties ti get them accepted in society , forget the children.

I am a happily married girl. My relatives look up to my husband as an example when they look for grooms for their daughters. I an financially independent. We created a joint account just to get an address proof for passport. We give space to each other. At the same time, I like when my husband discuss with me before making some important decisions. Yes, it was a big risk tying the knot with a person so new to me, but I have been quite lucky.

I also have a couple friend from college time who lived in for 2 years before saying "I do".  But at the end, they are married.

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Every girl dreams of being a bride one day.  Every guy wishes to have a wife who behaves like a girlfriend.  Thus, for me, Marriage is the winner. Still, as I always said, it's totally an individual’s choice and needs.

Marriages are made in heaven.

Live in - not sure ;) but yes,

They say all marriages are made in heaven, but so are thunder and lightning. ~ Clint Eastwood

This post was written in response to Indispire - Topic 18

Are you married? What do you wish for - arranged or love? Let the world know by writing a comment.